"you said that fenimore cooper was as great as shakespeare." "that wasn't wrong, it was only ridiculous."
i just went to see junot díaz speak and he’s literally the smartest person i’ve ever been within twenty feet of, he’s fucking brilliant and and i am in awe
birthday: may 25th
single or taken: single
eye color: blue
middle name: micah
favourite color: grey
lucky number: 47
hogwarts house: ravenclaw
favourite fictional character: get ready for some Obscure Shit: sammy clay, vissarion belinsky, inigo montoya, gus fring, dana scully, al swearengen
favourite television show: breaking bad, deadwood, x files, justified, twilight zone, twin peaks
favourite season: summer
describe yourself in a few words: enthusiastic but cold (like. emotionally cold but also i’m freezing rn)
future children’s names: i don’t want kids but a girl would be named eleanor
meaning of your name: noble strength
ultimate otp: maybe mulder n scully
what do you plan to/do for a living: i’d like to be a politician or a film critic
starbucks order: green tea frappuccino w/ whipped cream bc i have no shame
THIS OR THAT:
introvert or extrovert: introvert
dawn or dusk: dusk
righty or lefty: righty
coffee or tea: nothing with caffeine so neither, really
rain or shine: rain
reading or writing: reading
man. man. if im not careful im gonna go to college in new york and study theater or something and structure my entire life around the fact that the recording of the 2006 performance of coast of utopia is just sitting in the lincoln center library and i cant access it unless im a ~~theatre professional, student, or researcher with work or study-related reasons for viewing~~
HEY HEY HEY HEYYYYYYYY MY FAVORITE QUEER DRUNK ASSHOLE POET TURNED 450 TODAY (and let me tell you, there is a lot of competition for the title “favorite queer drunk asshole poet”)
BUT as we all know, there is some controversy over who ACTUALLY wrote shakespeare’s plays!
so in order to mark this SERIOUS and LEGITIMATE issue, i have compiled the most likely theories in this comprehensive list:
- in julius caesar, cassius says, “this is my birthday; on this very day cassius was born.” on that same day, cassius DIES. guess who else was not only born on april 23, but died april 23?? that’s right, shakespeare. english playwright? or ancient roman ghost bent on revenge? YOU BE THE JUDGE.
- shakespeare married a woman called anne hathaway. BATMAN ALSO MARRIED ANNE HATHAWAY. have you ever seen shakespeare and batman in the same place at the same time??????
- lived in london? totally encountered prostitutes several times? probably spoke english? william shakespeare……. or JACK THE RIPPER
- uh, excuse me, an uneducated glovemaker’s son couldn’t possibly have written the 38 works of art attributed to shakespeare. please consider instead this picture of a cat pushing another cat in a shopping cart. you’re welcome.
- ””“”“”“”“”“president obama????”“”“”“”“” more like PRESIDENT WILLIAMSHAKESPOBAMA. wake UP, america
- ME I’M WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE I HAVE BEEN SHAKESPEARE ALL ALONG AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOU FOOLS YOU IGNORANT FOOLS
do you think anyone ever misinterpreted roland barthes’ death of the author essay so badly that he just had to correct them
nbc hannibal and i are takin a break but freddie lounds and i are goin steady